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Monday 13 August 2012

TGTBT

Sometimes we can't see the forest for the trees. It's a fairly normal bit of human stupidity. But the old saying "If it seems too good to be true, it probably is" exists for a reason. Broken down into lawyer speak, it translates into "This is the common rule but there are exceptions."

Because this blog is all about booty and how to access more of it
I'll skim over that angle on my way to the punchline. Men and women are dumbasses when it comes to human interactions. We're also highly conditioned to be entirely fucked up so it's no real surprise.




We all want to believe "this time is different", I think they call it faith... though there are are more than a few of you stuck on the "You People" perception that is, quite frankly, going to get you nowhere in the booty game with people who aren't hung up on all of their past experiences with other humans being.

Relating is a way to gain self awareness. It's just that the words "relating", "relationship", "relations", and etc. are so fucking charged that you start hyperventilating at their mention. Those are your projections and expectations, not the words themselves. That's just real talk.



Let's try to supplant the words "mirror", "mirroring", "mirrorship", "mirrors" and etc. Mirrors are a tool. We use them to reflect ourselves back to ourselves. An inverted image but otherwise very accurate in it's presentation. So we have the options any tools offers. We can use it to fix our hair, find muscle groups that need more attention, and generally see what areas of the report card were evaluated as needing improvement.



What you're looking for is what you see. Period. Look around the room you are in and take really good stock of all of the blue things you can see. Try to remember five things that are blue, I'll come back to this.

If all you can think of is how fucked over you've been by... that bitch ex-wife, that deadbeat baby daddy, your daddy, or mommy, or whothefuckever has so ravaged your soul... all you will see are reminders of that human shittiness. But if you can shake that stupidity you will be able to see that it ain't all thorns. A few times a year that stupid bush comes up roses. And when you risk the thorns, by being aware that they exist and coming in prepared, to trim off all the dead shit, the flowers are even bigger and brighter. Maybe roses became The Flower because daisies just aren't enough of a challenge to get to.


You're getting stuck in content again, forgetting it's all theoretical talk, analogies and metaphors that get mixed horribly on the way to the punchline. Remember all that blue stuff you inventorized? Close your eyes and tell me ten items that are brown... not fair, you peeked. But if you didn't cheat and look around at all the brown stuff you didn't notice when I directed you to the blue stuff, you might be thinking, "Damn, that bitch tricked me by going on about the Blue Quiz that'd be coming. I was really focused on that part of the test." Or something else along those lines, though that's the most common response.

In a relationship, sorry, "mirrorship", The Honeymoon Stage is when the other person says "Lookit all this blueness!" and you're all "Yaaa, blue stuff, sighhh". And in turn, you respond with "Oh hey, lookit all my blueness." And the other person sighs and it's wonderful, and nothing could ever go wrong because those expectations that "Blue Is Where It's At and The Rest of The Rainbow, Meh, Not On My Mind" could never interfere with this fantasy of perpetual wonderfulness.

Or you can pay attention to what else the person is saying, and doing, and trust them as the authority, rather than reading your own wishful thinking into it. Even when it's stuff you don't want to hear. Especially then. You can ignore incompatibilities for a little bit, especially if the sex is good, but at a certain point you'll wake up from the stupor totally pissed at yourself for being such a dumbass. Hindsight is 20/20... but if you keep finding yourself in that "same ole shitstorm", you're not learning from your reflections. Which in turn solidifies your perception of "You People" toward the opposite sex and the vicious cycle continues.



*The guy who thinks all women are gold diggers because he keeps dating strippers, who bail after they find out he's not going to be her sugar daddy. 
*The one who thinks all women are cheaters because his wives keep cheating because he keeps marrying (and fucking) women who cheated to be with him. 
*The chick who thinks all sperm donors are deadbeats because she keeps fucking random guys without protection against unplanned pregnancy. 
*The one who thinks all men are violently abusive because she keeps ignoring the warning signs that the people she gets involved with are escalating toward necessary cop intervention behaviour. 
*The lady who couldn't separate Porn User from Child Molester and is, unfortunately, going to pass those sick ideas about sex onto her poor kid, after having torn up the happy little family unit when her ex-husband watched porn online because he wasn't getting any... 
*The guy who can't stop thinking about that bitch, whom he let use him, long enough to see the awesome chick in front of him is nothing like that. 
*The one who keeps fucking every date on the first date and still can't figure out why there isn't a marriage proposal on the horizon.
*Add yours here__________________________________________

Until you can acknowledge that you prefer the asshole (male or female) you'll never understand what need is being fulfilled to the point that you'll ignore the rest of the rainbow to your detriment. Until you understand what you're doing and why, you're kinda blind in any attempts you make to "fix" your life, or make it better. You're not special in it, most people don't question why they do anything and can't figure out why life sucks so badly.



Look in the damn mirror, er relationship. You are the common element in your relationships. Are you ignoring all the signs that indicate you're doing the same shit with a different person, who turns out to be just like that other person. Whether you're the victim, persecutor or rescuer in those drama triangles, it's still you that's common.

This isn't a "Haha, you deserved that!", but an honest question about why you keep choosing the shithead variety of partner that you've determined ain't your bhag but can't seem to shake. The shithead variety runs the gamut from cutting you off the booty all the way to physical violence, whether you're the enabler who is meting out the shittiness or the enabler on the receiving end of that shittiness. Are you the one who is lying about who you are, or using the punchy method to get your way? Emotional abuse is no less shitty than raping and beating, it just leaves fewer physical signs of the damage. Regardless of how shitty your shitty is,  perhaps you're coming at this from the "What's wrong with them?" angle instead of the "What's wrong with me?" perspective that might actually get you out your rut.

Or could it be that your fantasy addled mind has tricked you into seeing all the blue, and only the blue? That you've forgotten the Too Good To Be True advice? "Stop, drop and roll" is good advice if you're on fire but a fire in the panties isn't the same thing by any stretch of that imagination of yours. A very few people or situations are going to be highly compatible but you can take a bit of time and awareness to assess that ahead of time. And act intentionally.

Whether it's a personal or professional "mirrorship" if you go at life with a little purpose, that is knowing your own motivations and intentions, you'll invariably land more successes simply because you've intentionally avoided the time wasters in the first place and spent your time and energy on more promising ventures. If your success is measured only by one colour of the spectrum of the rainbow, you'll find yourself more than a little disappointed. For example, if your life's sole mission is to "get laid" or "snag a spouse" or "make an army of children", every interaction that isn't is going to suck by comparison. But none of the above are available to you without a broader mission statement so it turns into The Suck Express.





I'm getting off onto some other shit here so I'll just snap it back to the fact that this is yet another article about How To Use The Internet. This new fandangled Internet contraption sure is a great help to you in navigating all this bullshit. You can Google just about anything that Seems Too Good To Be True, like this article. Even people can be googled now, it's amazing. And then you can keep in mind that history repeats itself, so if s/he's talking shit on Facebook, about psycho/bitches s/he once claimed to love, guess where you'll be in a matter of time. And vice versa. But while you're on Facebook anyway, "like" my Page

What can I say, shameless self promotion gets hits.


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