Unfocused...

I was recently given some feedback, delivered by a man who was still trying to convince me to go visit him, in Cambodia, and with an invitation thoroughly based on nothing, in that we haven't yet had a genuine conversation, and he knows fuck nothing about the kinda crazy I have tucked up my sleeve, and let's not forget I am in Canada, eh, that my writing was unfocused and that I needed to take a writing course before I'd be able to get people reading... Is it because my sentences aren't seven words long, as per the standard guidelines of writing for those whose reading comprehension is at a sixth grade level? Is it because I make commas my bitch and slut them out all over the damn place?

Simple Town

"Every picture tells a story, don't it?"

Sometimes it helps to read the words in, beside, under or around the pictures.

Name Dropping

I read an article quoting William Shatner as saying "What's Twitter?" so I guess I'm following a faker... Lame. Even lamer that I can't remember if it was actually Shatner or someone else. Fuck it.

My question 

Writing Adult Entertainment...

Jefferson Airplane was absolutely right, when they wailed, "It's no secret, how strong my love is for you." It's certainly no secret that I love writing. LOVE IT. In a way that words can't express... that'd be where I'd toss in an "lol", if we were texting. 

Meet The Artist

My stunt double is taking a much needed leave of absence after you twats drove her mad with your stupidity. That's shitty for her but excellent for you because the chance of a lifetime is rearing it's beautiful head as a result.

The debate about my status as a hot chick or a but'erface is the hottest topic in all your tabloid magazines. 'Cause y'know, whether I'm pleasant or unfortunate looking has a lot of bearing on whether or not I can compose a fucking sentence. Or a regular sentence. Makes perfect sense.

Legitimate Rape?

Illegitimate rape must be where the illegitimate children come from... things are making a lot more sense now.

What could I say about this dumbass that The Onion hasn't said better?

A Bright Idea

Ain't that the truth...

So, I was all, "Fuck this, I'm going to buy a lamp..."

Disclaimer

It seems that everything I say needs to come with a disclaimer... I won't get into the reasons you let your filters lead you to believe I am saying things I'm not. It's Saturday, I need a manicure before I can type at you about my sexcapades of late so you're going to need to blast through your own filters today. Blow your own

DFB Has An Exciting New Feature

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Inspired by comedian Paul Mooney's "Ask A Black Dude", I'm injecting a new segment into Donors For Boners: "Ask A Hot Chick".

Facebook Creepers

You know those times when you're lurking on Facebook and you see a friend of a friend comment on your friend's post. So you click on their profile and creep their pictures. And then you see someone who is so hot you want to eat them