Facebook Creepers

You know those times when you're lurking on Facebook and you see a friend of a friend comment on your friend's post. So you click on their profile and creep their pictures. And then you see someone who is so hot you want to eat them

Wanna Chat?

"Wanna Chat?" And other Freakquently Asked Questions...

A conglomerate (of men) and I were having this conversation. Approximately 18, 000 times. It's slightly paraphrased for flow but this is pretty much how the conversations go, give or take. It just kinda blurs into a single idiot in my head. They really don't distinguish themselves from the other idiots that well because the conversations are so remarkably similar that they might be using the same script. 

Ladies, or guys: if you have an amazing man (or two, or whatever your fucking slutty deal is) in your life, go fuck the shit out of him right now. Right now!! If you're on the rag and don't "do" period sex cuz it's against your religion or some shit, go suck his dick until he blows all over your goddamned face. If you just got your tongue pierced and are still riding out the 6-8 weeks, give him the best handjob he ever had, or take it in the ass. If he'in another country send nude ass pics to his phone, straight up phone sex, do whatever you gotta do to give that man some booty treasure.